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itâs the fear of loving again.</h2><hr class="he-boLi-1053c1d"/></div><div class="he-meWr-1249476"><div class="he-imCo-14461c5"><img src="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/landscape/10851426226c-practical-magic-sandra-bullock-nicole-kidman.jpg" sizes="(min-width:1280px) 730px, (min-width:960px) 45vw, (min-width:768px) 45vw, (min-width:320px) 100vw, 100vw" srcSet="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/landscape/10851426226c-practical-magic-sandra-bullock-nicole-kidman.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_960 960w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/landscape/10851426226c-practical-magic-sandra-bullock-nicole-kidman.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_360 360w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/landscape/10851426226c-practical-magic-sandra-bullock-nicole-kidman.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_640 640w" width="1920" height="1080" loading="eager" decoding="async" alt="Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman attend the Practical Magic 2 premiere" fetchpriority="high" class="he-image" data-flatplan="fp_leadPhotoCaption"/><span class="he-imCr-1233683">© Getty Images</span></div></div></div></div> <div class="-variation-megabanner -style-1" data-sticky-megabanner="false" data-ad-title="ADVERTISEMENT"><div class="desktop adCo-11280b3"><div id="div-megabanner_0" data-refresh-count="0"></div></div></div> <!-- --> <!-- --> 24 <div class="gc-col-12 gc-row hm-grid hm-grid__section hm-grid__article"> 25 <div class="gc-col-8 gc-row hm-grid__content hm-grid__content--article"> 26 <div class="gc-col-12 gc-row"> 27 <div class="he-arBy-1351edd he-theme he-goPrSoWr-29264dd"><div class="he-arByIn-1859323 he-arByInRe-2687baa"><div class="he-auAnTi-1448f59"><div class="he-exAu-14942ea">By<!-- --> <span>Rachel Hart-Phillips</span></div><div class="he-loTi-13508a5 he-loTi-13508a5 he-theme"><span class="he-loTiSp-1752866">5 days ago</span><time class="he-loTiTiTa-203339b" dateTime="2026-09-18T14:30:21.008Z">Sep 18, 2026, 3:30 PM GMT+1</time></div><div class="he-viArNuCo-3024de1 he-theme"><a href="#viafoura-container-924215" class="he-viNuCoLi-271402a" aria-label="Go to comments section"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="14" height="14" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 14 14" aria-hidden="true" class="he-viArIc-1962018 hm-icon"><path fill="#ED3648" d="M3.5 3.5h7v1.4h-7zm0 2.8h4.9v1.4H3.5z"></path><path fill="#ED3648" d="M12.6 0H1.4C.628 0 0 .628 0 1.4V14l3.733-2.8H12.6c.772 0 1.4-.628 1.4-1.4V1.4c0-.772-.628-1.4-1.4-1.4m0 9.8H3.267L1.4 11.2V1.4h11.2z"></path></svg><vf-conversations-count vf-container-id="924215" class="he-viCoLa-2179b9b" aria-hidden="true"></vf-conversations-count><span class="he-viCoLa-2179b9b" aria-live="polite">LEAVE A COMMENT</span></a></div></div><div class="he-soShWr-2088523"><div id="socialSharing" class="he-soSh-13519cb he-soSh-13519cb he-theme he-soShHo-2417e03 he-soShEx-2363117"><ul class="he-soShLi-1864eac">
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Like so many of us, I loved it purely for the witchcraft - the magic of the spells, the enduring sisterhood, and those dreamy 90s outfits.</p><ev-engagement id="horizon_hello" group-name="horizon_hello"></ev-engagement><div id="w-embedded-paywall" class="ev-paywall-container new-model-evolok"></div><p id="eWYlZCmaXPC" data-wc="24">I certainly didn't watch it for the grief. In fact, I don't think I even realised grief was what the film was truly about.</p><div class="fr-embedded"> 30 <div data-wc="75" id="eML7etqjYJ"><figure class="he-meIm-995f02"><div class="he-imCo-14461c5"><img src="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/bbd5f471431a-practical-magic.jpg" sizes="(min-width:1360px) 630px, (min-width:960px) 60vw, (min-width:320px) calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2)), calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2))" srcSet="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/bbd5f471431a-practical-magic.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_960 960w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/bbd5f471431a-practical-magic.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_640 640w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/bbd5f471431a-practical-magic.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_360 360w" width="1024" height="643" loading="lazy" decoding="async" alt="Nicole and Sandra starred in Practical Magic back in 1998" fetchpriority="auto" class="image he-image" data-flatplan="fp_photoCaption"/><span class="he-imCr-1233683">© Alamy</span></div><figcaption class="he-meImCa-17135c3">Nicole and Sandra starred in Practical Magic back in 1998</figcaption></figure></div> 31</div><p id="eGViL3RSGue" data-wc="53">Twenty-eight years later, I sat in the cinema, popcorn in hand, to watch the sequel as a very different person. In the decades between that first viewing and this one, Iâd lost my dad. Then my mum. Then my first husband died by suicide when I was pregnant with our son, aged 36.</p><p id="eETnPfaF9Oi" data-wc="51">In the years since, Iâve built a career as a <a class="hm-link he-link noskim" href="https://www.theafterglowspace.com/" rel="noncommercial noopener nofollow" target="_blank" data-mrf-recirculation="article-body-link">grief coach</a>, spending my days holding space for others finding their own way after loss. Yet nothing quite prepared me for how profou
31ndly a film about witches and curses would affect me once Iâd lived through what it was actually describing.</p><div class="fr-embedded"> 32 <div data-wc="200" id="evhpEzSOCJ"><figure class="he-meIm-995f02"><div class="he-imCo-14461c5"><img src="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/4ebd46a36538-r2a0958-the-after-glow-space-sara-swallow-photo.jpg" sizes="(min-width:1360px) 630px, (min-width:960px) 60vw, (min-width:320px) calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2)), calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2))" srcSet="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/4ebd46a36538-r2a0958-the-after-glow-space-sara-swallow-photo.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_960 960w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/4ebd46a36538-r2a0958-the-after-glow-space-sara-swallow-photo.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_640 640w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/4ebd46a36538-r2a0958-the-after-glow-space-sara-swallow-photo.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_360 360w" width="682" height="1024" loading="lazy" decoding="async" alt="Rachel set up AfterGlow to help people honour grief and build a beautiful life" fetchpriority="auto" class="image he-image" data-flatplan="fp_photoCaption"/><span class="he-imCr-1233683">© Sara Swallow</span></div><figcaption class="he-meImCa-17135c3">Rachel set up AfterGlow to help people honour grief and build a beautiful life</figcaption></figure></div> 33</div><h2 dir="ltr" data-wc="6" id="h2-4muf9rzxo">Grief can feel like a curse</h2><p id="eyfyG6yLmkT" data-wc="19">What struck me most was that the Owens curse isn't really about magic at all - it's about grief.</p><p id="enaP8T8h-4Y" data-wc="63">In the film, loving someone means youâre bound to lose them. In real life, most of us don't need an ancient curse to believe that, because loss does the job for us. After you've suffered severe heartbreak, love can start to feel dangerous in the exact way the movie depicts: like something you'd be a fool to fully open yourself up to again.</p><p id="ey4_MzQQ1OJD" data-wc="34">For a long time, grief felt like an inherited curse to me. There were years when "don't love too hard, don't hope too much" wasn't just movie dialogue - it was how I lived.</p><div class="fr-embedded"> 34 <div data-wc="200" id="eP842FZAAN"><figure class="he-meIm-995f02"><div class="he-imCo-14461c5"><img src="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/91f5418b7cb4-practical-magic-movie.jpg" sizes="(min-width:1360px) 630px, (min-width:960px) 60vw, (min-width:320px) calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2)), calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2))" srcSet="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/91f5418b7cb4-practical-magic-movie.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_960 960w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/91f5418b7cb4-practical-magic-movie.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_640 640w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/91f5418b7cb4-practical-magic-movie.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_360 360w" width="979" height="1024" loading="lazy" decoding="async" alt="Practical Magic 2 is out now" fetchpriority="auto" class="image he-image" data-flatplan="fp_photoCaption"/><span class="he-imCr-1233683">© Instagram</span></div><figcaption class="he-meImCa-17135c3">Practical Magic 2 is out now</figcaption></figure></div> 35</div><h2 dir="ltr" data-wc="6" id="h2-4muf9rzxp">Thereâs no ârightâ way to grieve</h2><p id="eerQNGQpe6Vl" data-wc="66">What the film captures so brilliantly is that grief never looks identical in two people. Sally freezes. She withdraws, closes down, and tries to keep everyone safe by keeping them at a distanceâincluding herself. Gillian, on the other hand, runs in the opposite direction. She flees toward distraction and anyone who might fill the void, running from stillness because stillness is where the grief catches up.</p><p id="ej7x0Z95h2GP" data-wc="62">Both reactions are completely normal. I've sat with clients who lean into one or the other, and sometimes both on the very same day. I've been both myself across different losses. We don't get to choose how grief shows up for us; all we can do is figure out what we need when it arrives, as messy as that process may be.</p><div class="fr-embedded"> 36 <div data-wc="75" id="e-ht8xIXoQ"><figure class="he-meIm-995f02"><div class="he-imCo-14461c5"><img src="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/30bc9c175486-rev-1-pm2-tp-067highresjpeg.jpg" sizes="(min-width:1360px) 630px, (min-width:960px) 60vw, (min-width:320px) calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2)), calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2))" srcSet="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/30bc9c175486-rev-1-pm2-tp-067highresjpeg.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_960 960w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/30bc9c175486-rev-1-pm2-tp-067highresjpeg.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_640 640w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/30bc9c175486-rev-1-pm2-tp-067highresjpeg.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_360 360w" width="1024" height="447" loading="lazy" decoding="async" alt="If you loved the first Practical Magic, you'll know all about 'Midnight Margaritas'" fetchpriority="auto" class="image he-image" data-flatplan="fp_photoCaption"/><span class="he-imCr-1233683">© Warner</span></div><figcaption class="he-meImCa-17135c3">If you loved the first Practical Magic, you'll know all about 'Midnight Margaritas'</figcaption></figure></div> 37</div><h2 dir="ltr" data-wc="3" id="h2-4muf9rzxq">Grief and children</h2><p id="edjeI8tAQ4DX" data-wc="27">Sally tries to protect her daughters by keeping the hardest parts of the family story hidden, while Gillian believes the truth should be out in the open.</p><p id="e5iHFjC1weSD" data-wc="45">Thatâs something I reflect on constantly with my own son. How do you pass down the truth of what happened without passing down the fear that came with it? How do you allow a child to know grief without handing them all the lingering trauma?</p><p id="efDyR8cKppj1" data-wc="24">I don't know the answer, and there isnât a neat one. There is only the ongoing, quiet work of figuring it outâslowly, imperfectly, together.</p><div class="fr-embedded"> 38 <div data-wc="75" id="eY-Km8uOAz"><figure class="he-meIm-995f02"><div class="he-imCo-14461c5"><img src="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/f49435393307-daughters-on-practical-magic.jpg" sizes="(min-width:1360px) 630px, (min-width:960px) 60vw, (min-width:320px) calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2)), calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2))" srcSet="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/f49435393307-daughters-on-practical-magic.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_960 960w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/f49435393307-daughters-on-practical-magic.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_640 640w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/f49435393307-daughters-on-practical-magic.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_360 360w" width="1024" height="608" loading="lazy" decoding="async" alt="Maisie Williams and Joey King also star in Practical Magic 2" fetchpriority="auto" class="image he-image" data-flatplan="fp_photoCaption"/><span class="he-imCr-1233683">© Warner</span></div><figcaption class="he-meImCa-17135c3">Maisie Williams and Joey King also star in Practical Magic 2</figcaption></figure></div> 39</div><h2 dir="ltr" data-wc="5" id="h2-4muf9rzxr">Grief and joy can coexist</h2><p id="ed1nZLHDtcEa" data-wc="44">One truth I hold close in my practice is that grief doesn't get "fixed." By the story'
39s end, nothing about the Owens family's loss disappears. What changes is that they stop carrying it alone - and perhaps that is what truly breaks the curse.</p><p id="eOhq9DrRyAaQ" data-wc="75">In the iconic "Midnight Margaritas" scene, the women dance around the kitchen, half-laughing, half-crying. It's grief and joy sitting right beside each other without one canceling out the other. It is an extraordinarily honest portrayal of life with loss: laughing doesn't mean you've stopped grieving, and finding happiness doesn't mean you've left someone behind. Sometimes, you can be utterly heartbroken and still have a wonderful night dancing around the kitchen with tears in your eyes.</p><div class="fr-embedded"> 40 <div data-wc="75" id="eAWXWjbiV1"><figure class="he-meIm-995f02"><div class="he-imCo-14461c5"><img src="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/5bec4528d9b3-coven.jpg" sizes="(min-width:1360px) 630px, (min-width:960px) 60vw, (min-width:320px) calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2)), calc(100vw - (var(--page-gutter) * 2))" srcSet="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/5bec4528d9b3-coven.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_960 960w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/5bec4528d9b3-coven.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_640 640w, https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/original_aspect_ratio/5bec4528d9b3-coven.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_360 360w" width="1024" height="655" loading="lazy" decoding="async" alt="We all need to find our tribe to deal with the tough parts of life" fetchpriority="auto" class="image he-image" data-flatplan="fp_photoCaption"/><span class="he-imCr-1233683">© Warner</span></div><figcaption class="he-meImCa-17135c3">We all need to find our tribe to deal with the tough parts of life</figcaption></figure></div> 41</div><h2 dir="ltr" data-wc="3" id="h2-4muf9rzxs">Find your tribe</h2><p id="e28sdA9Y1pJ2" data-wc="15">You don't have to "get over it." You just don't have to do it alone.</p><p id="eseIggV-_ZJ8" data-wc="63">That principle is why I built my grief coaching practice, <a class="hm-link he-link noskim" href="https://www.theafterglowspace.com/" rel="noncommercial noopener nofollow" target="_blank" data-mrf-recirculation="article-body-link">AfterGlow</a>. The people I work with aren't looking for someone to repair their grief or set a deadline for when it should end. They are looking for what grief ultimately demands we find: a tribe. People who can sit in the dark with you without flinching, without rushing you out the other side.</p><p id="eMFPFopxyprk" data-wc="39">Grief can feel like a curse for a long time. What I've learnedâslowly and often the hard wayâis that you donât have to carry it like one. A life with grief doesn't have to mean a life without magic.</p><p id="eRjRXbIqIRMh" data-wc="14">Sometimes you just need a little help from your coven to find it again.</p><p id="edKT6oUKPA" data-wc="5"><strong>Follow Rachel on Instagram <a class="hm-link he-link" href="https://www.instagram.com/theafterglowspace/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank" data-mrf-recirculation="article-body-link">@theafterglowspace</a>.</strong></p><div class="fr-embedded"> 42 <div data-mrf-recirculation="You may also like"><div data-wc="50" id="eMbmY0GOMj"><div data-mrf-recirculation="related-content" class="he-reCo-146821e -category-second-act he-theme js-rel-content"><h4 class="he-720f74 he-reCoTi-1982b82">You may also like</h4><nav aria-label="Continue reading more related articles of 'You may also like'"><ul class="he-reCoLi-18802bd"><li class="he-reCoIt-186740b"><article class=" he-theme he-card he-caHaLi-10929fc"><div class="he-caMe-890111"><div class="he-caImWr-1630256"><a aria-label="The original Practical Magic 1998 premiere in iconic throwback photos â Mariska Hargitay, Sandra Bullock, more" class="he-caLi-80899a he-link" href="https://www.hellomagazine.com/us/922782/practical-magic-1998-premiere-photos-sandra-bullock-mariska-hargitay/"><img src="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/square/ee637a7809e4-practical-magic-1998.jpg" sizes="(min-width:1360px) 88px, 88px" srcSet="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/square/ee637a7809e4-practical-magic-1998.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_160 160w" width="1080" height="1080" loading="lazy" decoding="async" alt="The original Practical Magic 1998 premiere in iconic throwback photos â Mariska Hargitay, Sandra Bullock, more" fetchpriority="auto" class="he-image"/></a></div></div><div class="he-caCo-114145e"><h5 class="he-720f74 he-caTi-924647"><a aria-label="The original Practical Magic 1998 premiere in iconic throwback photos â Mariska Hargitay, Sandra Bullock, more" class="he-caLi-80899a he-link" href="https://www.hellomagazine.com/us/922782/practical-magic-1998-premiere-photos-sandra-bullock-mariska-hargitay/">The original Practical Magic 1998 premiere in iconic throwback photos â Mariska Hargitay, Sandra Bullock, more</a></h5></div></article></li><li class="he-reCoIt-186740b"><article class=" he-theme he-card he-caHaLi-10929fc"><div class="he-caMe-890111"><div class="he-caImWr-1630256"><a aria-label="The 7 types of friend every woman needs in her 40s and 50s" class="he-caLi-80899a he-link" href="https://www.hellomagazine.com/second-act/914582/friends-every-woman-needs-in-her-40s-and-50s/"><img src="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/square/c7d63153b80c-second-act-friendships.jpg" sizes="(min-width:1360px) 88px, 88px" srcSet="https://images.hellomagazine.com/horizon/square/c7d63153b80c-second-act-friendships.jpg?tx=c_limit,w_160 160w" width="1080" height="1080" loading="lazy" decoding="async" alt="The 7 types of friend every woman needs in her 40s and 50s" fetchpriority="auto" class="he-image"/></a></div></div><div class="he-caCo-114145e"><h5 class="he-720f74 he-caTi-924647"><a aria-label="The 7 types of friend every woman needs in her 40s and 50s" class="he-caLi-80899a he-link" href="https://www.hellomagazine.com/second-act/914582/friends-every-woman-needs-in-her-40s-and-50s/">The 7 types of friend every woman needs in her 40s and 50s</a></h5></div></article></li></ul></nav></div></div></div> 43</div><p id="eBGSaH0d-sR" data-wc="0"></p></div><div></div> 44 </div> <div data-wc="200" id="e-7oXeILTc"><div class="he-viAnLiBuCo-3429c51"><button type="button" class="he-viAnLiBu-2498d06 button bu-p-1485006" aria-label="Go to comments section" aria-expanded="false">Leave a comment<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="18" height="19" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 18 19" aria-hidden="true" class="hm-icon">
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Comments featured and views shared are not endorsed by HELLO!. <br></p><vf-conversations vf-container-id="924215" limit="10" pagination-limit="10" reply-limit="5" pagination-reply-limit="2"></vf-conversations></div></div> <div><div data-mrf-recirculation="outbrain" class="ou-868f8a OUTBRAIN" data-src="https://www.hellomagazine.com/second-act/924215/im-a-grief-coach-and-this-is-what-practical-magic-2-really-teaches-us-about-grief-and-loss/" data-widget-id="AR_23"></div></div> <div data-mrf-recirculation="Read More"><section data-mrf-recirculation="" class=" he-theme he-re-1396195 he--s-s-7011b7 -category-second-act he-seIn-1589a3d" aria-label="Read More"><div class="he-reBa-2420469"><div class="-background-grey with-line he-blTi-1037b62"><div class="he-blTiBl-1528d1e"><div class="he-blTiTi-15516ef"><span class="he-720f74 he-blTiHe-17253e0">Read More</span></div></div></div><div class="he-reCo-2127550"><article class=" he-theme he-card he-caHaLi-10929fc -no-image"><div class="he-caCo-114145e"><h5 class="he-720f74 he-caTi-924647"><a aria-label="Gabby Logan: I didnât realise I needed therapy to process my grief" class="he-caLi-80899a he-link" href="https://www.hellomagazine.com/second-act/902439/gabby-logan-grief-therapy-family-dynamics/">Gabby Logan: I didnât realise I needed therapy to process my grief</a></h5></div></article><article class=" he-theme he-card he-caHaLi-10929fc -no-image"><div class="he-caCo-114145e"><h5 class="he-720f74 he-caTi-924647"><div class="icTe-846e52 he-caTiIc-1317a39"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="14" height="20" fill="none" aria-hidden="true" viewBox="0 0 14 20" class="icTeIc-1239df0 podcast-article-icon hm-icon"><path stroke="currentColor" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="1.2" d="M6.727 1.081a2.455 2.455 0 0 0-2.454 2.455v6.545a2.455 2.455 0 0 0 4.909 0V3.536A2.455 2.455 0 0 0 6.727 1.08Z"></path><path stroke="currentColor" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="1.2" d="M12.454 8.445v1.636a5.728 5.728 0 0 1-11.454 0V8.445m5.727 7.363v3.273m-3.272 0H10"></path></svg></div><a aria-label="âI never felt the need to do whatâs expected of meâ - Deborah Meaden on breaking the rules and choosing a childfree life" class="he-caLi-80899a he-link" href="https://www.hellomagazine.com/second-act/921004/dragons-den-deborah-meaden-on-breaking-the-rules-and-choosing-a-childfree-life/">âI never felt the need to do whatâs expected of meâ - Deborah Meaden on breaking the rules and choosing a childfree life</a></h5></div></article><article class=" he-theme he-card he-caHaLi-10929fc -no-image"><div class="he-caCo-114145e"><h5 class="he-720f74 he-caTi-924647"><a aria-label="Menopause was a shock - but should we blame it for everything that goes wrong in midlife?" class="he-caLi-80899a he-link" href="https://www.hellomagazine.com/second-act/920365/menopause-shock-blame-menowashing-insomnia-sandwich-generation-comedian-lucy-porter/">Menopause was a shock - but should we blame it for everything that goes wrong in midlife?</a></h5></div></article><article class=" he-theme he-card he-caHaLi-10929fc -no-image"><div class="he-caCo-114145e"><h5 class="he-720f74 he-caTi-924647"><a aria-label="Drew Barrymore just sparked the conversation midlife single women needed" class="he-caLi-80899a he-link" href="https://www.hellomagazine.com/second-act/918609/drew-barrymore-just-sparked-the-conversation-midlife-single-women-needed/">Drew Barrymore just sparked the conversation midlife single women needed</a></h5></div></article></div></div></section></div> 68 </div> 69</main> <div class="sticky100 he-stElMo-1977d71"><div class="he-stElBa-2401fc4 he--white"><button type="button" class="he-stElCl-1879bac he--right he-stElHi-1755350" aria-label="Close banner" title="Close banner">â</button></div></div><div></div><footer id="hm-footer" class="he-footer" aria-label="Footer">
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69ndly a film about witches and curses would affect me once I\u0026#x2019;d lived through what it was actually describing.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n {{{evhpEzSOCJ}}}\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\" data-wc=\"6\" id=\"h2-4muf9rzxo\"\u003eGrief can feel like a curse\u003c/h2\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"eyfyG6yLmkT\" data-wc=\"19\"\u003eWhat struck me most was that the Owens curse isn\u0026apos;t really about magic at all - it\u0026apos;s about grief.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"enaP8T8h-4Y\" data-wc=\"63\"\u003eIn the film, loving someone means you\u0026#x2019;re bound to lose them. In real life, most of us don\u0026apos;t need an ancient curse to believe that, because loss does the job for us. After you\u0026apos;ve suffered severe heartbreak, love can start to feel dangerous in the exact way the movie depicts: like something you\u0026apos;d be a fool to fully open yourself up to again.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"ey4_MzQQ1OJD\" data-wc=\"34\"\u003eFor a long time, grief felt like an inherited curse to me. There were years when \u0026quot;don\u0026apos;t love too hard, don\u0026apos;t hope too much\u0026quot; wasn\u0026apos;t just movie dialogue - it was how I lived.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n {{{eP842FZAAN}}}\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\" data-wc=\"6\" id=\"h2-4muf9rzxp\"\u003eThere\u0026#x2019;s no \u0026#x2018;right\u0026#x2019; way to grieve\u003c/h2\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"eerQNGQpe6Vl\" data-wc=\"66\"\u003eWhat the film captures so brilliantly is that grief never looks identical in two people. Sally freezes. She withdraws, closes down, and tries to keep everyone safe by keeping them at a distance\u0026#x2014;including herself. Gillian, on the other hand, runs in the opposite direction. She flees toward distraction and anyone who might fill the void, running from stillness because stillness is where the grief catches up.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"ej7x0Z95h2GP\" data-wc=\"62\"\u003eBoth reactions are completely normal. I\u0026apos;ve sat with clients who lean into one or the other, and sometimes both on the very same day. I\u0026apos;ve been both myself across different losses. We don\u0026apos;t get to choose how grief shows up for us; all we can do is figure out what we need when it arrives, as messy as that process may be.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n {{{e-ht8xIXoQ}}}\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\" data-wc=\"3\" id=\"h2-4muf9rzxq\"\u003eGrief and children\u003c/h2\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"edjeI8tAQ4DX\" data-wc=\"27\"\u003eSally tries to protect her daughters by keeping the hardest parts of the family story hidden, while Gillian believes the truth should be out in the open.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"e5iHFjC1weSD\" data-wc=\"45\"\u003eThat\u0026#x2019;s something I reflect on constantly with my own son. How do you pass down the truth of what happened without passing down the fear that came with it? How do you allow a child to know grief without handing them all the lingering trauma?\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"efDyR8cKppj1\" data-wc=\"24\"\u003eI don\u0026apos;t know the answer, and there isn\u0026#x2019;t a neat one. There is only the ongoing, quiet work of figuring it out\u0026#x2014;slowly, imperfectly, together.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n {{{eY-Km8uOAz}}}\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\" data-wc=\"5\" id=\"h2-4muf9rzxr\"\u003eGrief and joy can coexist\u003c/h2\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"ed1nZLHDtcEa\" data-wc=\"44\"\u003eOne truth I hold close in my practice is that grief doesn\u0026apos;t get \u0026quot;fixed.\u0026quot; By the story\u0026apos;s end, nothing about the Owens family\u0026apos;s loss disappears. What changes is that they stop carrying it alone - and perhaps that is what truly breaks the curse.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"eOhq9DrRyAaQ\" data-wc=\"75\"\u003eIn the iconic \u0026quot;Midnight Margaritas\u0026quot; scene, the women dance around the kitchen, half-laughing, half-crying. It\u0026apos;s grief and joy sitting right beside each other without one canceling out the other. It is an extraordinarily honest portrayal of life with loss: laughing doesn\u0026apos;t mean you\u0026apos;ve stopped grieving, and finding happiness doesn\u0026apos;t mean you\u0026apos;ve left someone behind. Sometimes, you can be utterly heartbroken and still have a wonderful night dancing around the kitchen with tears in your eyes.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n {{{eAWXWjbiV1}}}\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\" data-wc=\"3\" id=\"h2-4muf9rzxs\"\u003eFind your tribe\u003c/h2\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"e28sdA9Y1pJ2\" data-wc=\"15\"\u003eYou don\u0026apos;t have to \u0026quot;get over it.\u0026quot; You just don\u0026apos;t have to do it alone.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"eseIggV-_ZJ8\" data-wc=\"63\"\u003eThat principle is why I built my grief coaching practice, {{{eHEjaAtUBv3}}}. The people I work with aren\u0026apos;t looking for someone to repair their grief or set a deadline for when it should end. They are looking for what grief ultimately demands we find: a tribe. People who can sit in the dark with you without flinching, without rushing you out the other side.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" id=\"eMFPFopxyprk\" data-wc=\"39\"\u003eGrief can feel like a curse for a long time. What I\u0026apos;ve learned\u0026#x2014;
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{{{eFX0QKFvTj}}}{{{ePRSiBoGyR}}} {{{e3jk7LBbNw}}} {{{e-5i2mPOIt}}} \n\u003cmain class=\"gc-col-12 gc-row\"\u003e\n \u003cdiv class=\"gc-col-12 gc-row hm-container role-main skin-container\"\u003e\n \u003carticle class=\"gc-col-12 gc-row\"\u003e\n {{{eufi4wBbWC}}} {{{eTg4m2JWX6}}} {{{efNfRYIrsR}}} {{{e1OQr7gKY4}}} \n \u003cdiv class=\"gc-col-12 gc-row hm-grid hm-grid__section hm-grid__article\"\u003e\n \u003cdiv class=\"gc-col-8 gc-row hm-grid__content hm-grid__content--article\"\u003e\n \u003cdiv class=\"gc-col-12 gc-row\"\u003e\n {{{eMAFlF-w74}}} {{{e5u7GCVY6q}}} \n \u003cdiv class=\"gc-col-12 hm-article__body -category-second-act\" style=\"width: 100.0%;\"\u003e\n \u003cwidget data-type=\"Article\" id=\"e5hPRVQDmt\"\u003e\u003cp id=\"eQBUq4CbZkR\" data-wc=\"38\"\u003eI remember watching Practical Magic for the first time as a teenager. Like so many of us, I loved it purely for the witchcraft - the magic of the spells, the enduring sisterhood, and those dreamy 90s outfits.\u003c/p\u003e{{{4muf9s00r}}}\u003cp id=\"eWYlZCmaXPC\" data-wc=\"24\"\u003eI certainly didn\u0026apos;t watch it for the grief. In fact, I don\u0026apos;t think I even realised grief was what the film was truly about.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n \u003cwidget id=\"eML7etqjYJ\" data-wc=\"75\" data-type=\"MediaImage\"\u003e\u003c/widget\u003e\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003cp id=\"eGViL3RSGue\" data-wc=\"53\"\u003eTwenty-eight years later, I sat in the cinema, popcorn in hand, to watch the sequel as a very different person. In the decades between that first viewing and this one, I\u0026#x2019;d lost my dad. Then my mum. Then my first husband died by suicide when I was pregnant with our son, aged 36.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp id=\"eETnPfaF9Oi\" data-wc=\"51\"\u003eIn the years since, I\u0026#x2019;ve built a career as a {{{e2YHR0yGYr2}}}, spending my days holding space for others finding their own way after loss. Yet nothing quite prepared me for how profou
69ndly a film about witches and curses would affect me once I\u0026#x2019;d lived through what it was actually describing.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n \u003cwidget id=\"evhpEzSOCJ\" data-wc=\"200\" data-type=\"MediaImage\"\u003e\u003c/widget\u003e\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\" data-wc=\"6\" id=\"h2-4muf9rzxo\"\u003eGrief can feel like a curse\u003c/h2\u003e\u003cp id=\"eyfyG6yLmkT\" data-wc=\"19\"\u003eWhat struck me most was that the Owens curse isn\u0026apos;t really about magic at all - it\u0026apos;s about grief.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp id=\"enaP8T8h-4Y\" data-wc=\"63\"\u003eIn the film, loving someone means you\u0026#x2019;re bound to lose them. In real life, most of us don\u0026apos;t need an ancient curse to believe that, because loss does the job for us. After you\u0026apos;ve suffered severe heartbreak, love can start to feel dangerous in the exact way the movie depicts: like something you\u0026apos;d be a fool to fully open yourself up to again.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp id=\"ey4_MzQQ1OJD\" data-wc=\"34\"\u003eFor a long time, grief felt like an inherited curse to me. There were years when \u0026quot;don\u0026apos;t love too hard, don\u0026apos;t hope too much\u0026quot; wasn\u0026apos;t just movie dialogue - it was how I lived.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n \u003cwidget id=\"eP842FZAAN\" data-wc=\"200\" data-type=\"MediaImage\"\u003e\u003c/widget\u003e\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\" data-wc=\"6\" id=\"h2-4muf9rzxp\"\u003eThere\u0026#x2019;s no \u0026#x2018;right\u0026#x2019; way to grieve\u003c/h2\u003e\u003cp id=\"eerQNGQpe6Vl\" data-wc=\"66\"\u003eWhat the film captures so brilliantly is that grief never looks identical in two people. Sally freezes. She withdraws, closes down, and tries to keep everyone safe by keeping them at a distance\u0026#x2014;including herself. Gillian, on the other hand, runs in the opposite direction. She flees toward distraction and anyone who might fill the void, running from stillness because stillness is where the grief catches up.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp id=\"ej7x0Z95h2GP\" data-wc=\"62\"\u003eBoth reactions are completely normal. I\u0026apos;ve sat with clients who lean into one or the other, and sometimes both on the very same day. I\u0026apos;ve been both myself across different losses. We don\u0026apos;t get to choose how grief shows up for us; all we can do is figure out what we need when it arrives, as messy as that process may be.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n \u003cwidget id=\"e-ht8xIXoQ\" data-wc=\"75\" data-type=\"MediaImage\"\u003e\u003c/widget\u003e\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\" data-wc=\"3\" id=\"h2-4muf9rzxq\"\u003eGrief and children\u003c/h2\u003e\u003cp id=\"edjeI8tAQ4DX\" data-wc=\"27\"\u003eSally tries to protect her daughters by keeping the hardest parts of the family story hidden, while Gillian believes the truth should be out in the open.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp id=\"e5iHFjC1weSD\" data-wc=\"45\"\u003eThat\u0026#x2019;s something I reflect on constantly with my own son. How do you pass down the truth of what happened without passing down the fear that came with it? How do you allow a child to know grief without handing them all the lingering trauma?\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp id=\"efDyR8cKppj1\" data-wc=\"24\"\u003eI don\u0026apos;t know the answer, and there isn\u0026#x2019;t a neat one. There is only the ongoing, quiet work of figuring it out\u0026#x2014;slowly, imperfectly, together.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n \u003cwidget id=\"eY-Km8uOAz\" data-wc=\"75\" data-type=\"MediaImage\"\u003e\u003c/widget\u003e\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\" data-wc=\"5\" id=\"h2-4muf9rzxr\"\u003eGrief and joy can coexist\u003c/h2\u003e\u003cp id=\"ed1nZLHDtcEa\" data-wc=\"44\"\u003eOne truth I hold close in my practice is that grief doesn\u0026apos;t get \u0026quot;fixed.\u0026quot; By the story\u0026apos;s end, nothing about the Owens family\u0026apos;s loss disappears. What changes is that they stop carrying it alone - and perhaps that is what truly breaks the curse.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp id=\"eOhq9DrRyAaQ\" data-wc=\"75\"\u003eIn the iconic \u0026quot;Midnight Margaritas\u0026quot; scene, the women dance around the kitchen, half-laughing, half-crying. It\u0026apos;s grief and joy sitting right beside each other without one canceling out the other. It is an extraordinarily honest portrayal of life with loss: laughing doesn\u0026apos;t mean you\u0026apos;ve stopped grieving, and finding happiness doesn\u0026apos;t mean you\u0026apos;ve left someone behind. Sometimes, you can be utterly heartbroken and still have a wonderful night dancing around the kitchen with tears in your eyes.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"fr-embedded\"\u003e\n \u003cwidget id=\"eAWXWjbiV1\" data-wc=\"75\" data-type=\"MediaImage\"\u003e\u003c/widget\u003e\n\u003c/div\u003e\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\" data-wc=\"3\" id=\"h2-4muf9rzxs\"\u003eFind your tribe\u003c/h2\u003e\u003cp id=\"e28sdA9Y1pJ2\" data-wc=\"15\"\u003eYou don\u0026apos;t have to \u0026quot;get over it.\u0026quot; You just don\u0026apos;t have to do it alone.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp id=\"eseIggV-_ZJ8\" data-wc=\"63\"\u003eThat principle is why I built my grief coaching practice, {{{eHEjaAtUBv3}}}. The people I work with aren\u0026apos;t looking for someone to repair their grief or set a deadline for when it should end. They are looking for what grief ultimately demands we find: a tribe. People who can sit in the dark with you without flinching, without rushing you out the other side.\u003c/p\u003e\u003cp id=\"eMFPFopxyprk\" data-wc=\"39\"\u003eGrief can feel like a curse for a long time. What I\u0026apos;ve learned\u0026#x2014;
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